The most part of this document is written by someone else as I once watched this video on YouTube that matched the description and definition about Emotional Abuse. All that is written in red are quotes and my own opinions & THOUGHTS about this particular subject are written in orange.
Just quoting…..
Abuse is any behavior that is designed to control and subjugate another human being through the use of fear, humiliation, intimidation, guilt, coercion, manipulation, etç. Emotional abuse is any kind of abuse that is emotional rather than physical in nature!
It can include anything from verbal abuse and constant criticism to more subtle tactics, such as repeated disapproval or even the refusal to ever be pleased.
Emotional abuse is like brainwashing in that it systematically wears way at the victim’s self-confidence, sense of self-worst, trust in their own and perceptions and self-concept.
Weather it is done by constant berating and belittling, by intimidation, or under the guise of “advice”, the results are similar.
Eventually, the recipient of the abuse loses all sense of self and remnants of personal value. Emotional abuse cuts to the very core of a person, creating scars that may be much far deeper and more lasting than physical ones.
In fact that is research to this effect. With the motional insult, the insults, insinuations, criticism and accusations slowly eat away at the victim’s self-esteem until she is incapable of judging the situation realistically.
The victim become so beaten down emotionally that she blames herself for the abuse. Her self-esteem is so low that she tolerates it.
NORMALLY, PEOPLE WHO USE HUMILIATION AS A FORM OF IMPOSING EMOTIONAL ABUSE, THROUGH THE SUPREMACY AND PRACTICE OF FEAR, THEY CAN’T STAND TO BECOME HUMILIATED THEMSELVES. STRANGE, ISN’T IT? THIS MEANS THAT THEY UNDERSTAND WHAT HUMILIATION IS AND WHAT IT REPRESENTS TO OTHER PEOPLE AROUND ISN’T IT?
(Carlos Pacheco)
Emotional abuse victims can become so convinced that they are worthless that they believe that no one else can want them. They stay in abusive situations because they believe they have nowhere else to go. Their ultimate fear is to be all alone.
TYPES OF EMOTIONAL ABUSE
ABUSIVE EXPECTATIONS
The other person places unreasonable demands on you and wants you to put everything else aside to tend to their needs. It could be a demand for constant attention, or a requirement that you spend all your free time with the person.
But no matter how much you give, it’s never enough. You are subjected to constant criticism, and you are constantly berated because you don’t fulfill all the other person’s needs.
ABUSIVE EXPECTATIONS ARE A SYMPTOM OF PERSONAL INSECURITY FROM THE ONE WHO PRACTICES EMOTIONAL ABUSE. IN FACT, THEIR ONLY WAY TO TRY TO AFFIRM THEMSELVES IS BY ADDRESSING THE WORD ALL THE TIME, TRYING TO BECOME THE FOCUS OF ATTENTION, TRYING TO LIMIT OTHER PEOPLE AROUND TO STAND FOR AN OPINION. SELFISHNESS & INSECURITY IS DIRECTLY RELATED TO THIS BEHAVIOR.
(Carlos Pacheco)
AGGRESSING
Aggressive forms of abuse include name-calling, accusing, blaming, threatening and ordering. Aggression behaviors are generally direct and obvious.
The one-up position the abuser assumes by attempting to judge or invalidate the recipient undermines the equality and autonomy that are essential to healthy adult relationships.
This parent-child pattern of communication (which is common to all forms of verbal abuse) is most obvious when the abuser takes an aggressive stance.
Aggressive abuse can also take a more indirect form and may be even be disguised and “helping”. Criticizing, advising, offering solutions, analyzing, proving and questioning another person may be a sincere attempt to help.
In some instances, however, these behaviors may be an attempt to belittle, control, or demean rather than help. The underlying judgmental “I know best” tone the abuser takes in these situations is inappropriate and creates unequal footing in peer relationships.
This and other types of emotional abuse can lead to what is known as learned helpless.
THE TENDENCY TO BECOME ALWAYS RIGHT AND CORRECT OR CONTRADICT THE OTHER PERSON’S OPINIONS, TASTES, EVEN BELIEFS IS PREDOMINANT ON ANY TYPE OF EMOTIONAL ABUSE. THAT FINAL EMOTIONAL GOAL IS TO BECOME THE CENTER OF ALL ATTENTION, TO BE ABLE TO CONTROL OTHER PEOPLE’S BEHAVIORS AND FINALLY BE THE MASTER IN COMMAND. THERE WILL BE ALWAYS AN ARGUMENT AGAINST EVERYBODY AND EVERYTHING. WHEN THIS GOAL IS NOT ACHIEVED, THAN THE ABUSER AGGRESSION STARTS SHOWING THROUGH WORDS AND ACTIONS.
(Carlos Pacheco)
CONSTANT CAHOS
The other person may deliberately start arguments and be in constant conflict with others. The person may be “addicted to drama” since it creates excitement.
DENYING
It means denying a person’s emotional needs, especially when they feel that need the most, and done with the intent of hurting, punishing or humiliating. The other person may deny that certain events occurred or certain things were said.
DOMINATING
Someone wants to control your every action. They have to have their own way, and will resort to threats to get it. When you allow someone else to dominate you, you lose respect for yourself.
EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL
The other person plays on your fear, guilt, compassion, values or other “hot buttons” to get what they want. This could include threats to end the relationship, totally reject or abandoning you, giving you the “cold shoulder”. For example, if the recipient tells the person they felt hurt by something the abuser did or said, the abuser might say “You are too sensitive. That shouldn’t hurt you”.
INVALIDATION
The abuser seeks to distort or undermine the recipient’s perception of their world. Invalidating occurs when the abuser refuses or fails to acknowledge reality.
MINIMIZING
Minimizing is a less extreme form of denial. When minimizing, the abuser may not deny that a particular event occurred, but they question the recipient’s emotional experience or reaction to an event. Statements as “You’re too sensitive”.
UNPREDICTABLE RESPONSES
This is the type of drastic mood changes or sudden emotional outbursts. Whenever someone in your life reacts very differently at different times to the same behavior from you, tells you one thing one day and the opposite thing the next, or likes something you do one day and hates it the next, you are being abused with unpredictable responses.
This behavior is damaging because it puts you always on the edge. You’re always waiting for the other shoe to drop, and you never know what’s expected of you. You must stay hyper vigilant, waiting for the other person’s next outburst or change of mood.
VERBAL ASSAULTS
Verbal assaults are expressed by berating, belittling, criticizing, name calling, screaming, threatening, excessive blaming, and using sarcasm and humiliation. Blowing your flaws out of proportion and making fun of you in front of others.
EVERYTIME ONE IMPOSES THEIR WILL ON ANOTHER, IT IS AN ACT OF VIOLENCE
(MAHATMA GHANDI)
